It’s ADHD Awareness Month

It’s ADHD Awareness Month, and I’ve been reflecting on how my ADHD has shown up while I’ve been grieving for my husband.

My overthinking has become more intense -replaying whether I could have done more, whether I made the best decisions, and whether they were what he would have wanted. I’ve also found myself overthinking guilt-guilt that I’m still here, guilt that making any choice that’s different to what we would have done together feels disloyal.

I worry about the future too. I don’t know what it looks like now, and that uncertainty can feel huge.

I’ve realised I don’t find it helpful to be around others who are really struggling. I absorb their sadness and it makes everything heavier. So I’ve had to protect myself by choosing not to do certain things, and I hope people understand that it’s not a lack of care- it’s self‑preservation.

I’ve been more exhausted than usual, even with everyday tasks. My social battery drains faster, and I’ve had to learn to set limits. I take regular breaks so I can keep going at work and stay steady.

Grief is hard enough on its own. Add ADHD into the mix, and there are extra layers, extra complications, and moments that feel harder to navigate.

October is also Liver Cancer Awareness Month. Cholangiocarcinoma- the cancer my husband died from- is a primary liver cancer. Once considered rare, it’s now recognised far more often. Raising awareness matters, because earlier understanding and recognition can change outcomes for others in the future.

Regards,

Sam Leonard