A while ago I shared the memory of how my husband’s brain tumour was discovered. It is now 20 months since he died and All I want is to follow him. My life has gone with him and I don’t want any other. When the snow came I considered walking away into the hills but that would upset my daughter. I’m sorry to put my sorrows onto you but I have no one to tell how I really feel and am finding the pressure to pretend that I’m OK too much so I’m more and more alone.
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I agree with you 100% , my husband died 14 weeks today so my pain is very very unbearable and raw. Like you I pretend that all is well, others say how well I am coping but it is pretending. Thankfully to Widowedcollective I am able to talk how I want to and people at the other end understand as unless you have lost your sout mate also, they just do not understand.
My life went with my husband also and l long for the day when my time is up and I am with him at long last, the sooner the better. I have joined 2 clubs for the “older person” that keeps me occupied up to a point. I need to get out and about, it is very lonely at home which I am sure it is for you.
I have therapy occasionally as and when the NHS can fit me in but it is nothing I have not heard before. Others have said my life will be different but without my husband, which is not what I want to hear. No two people seem to have the same reaction when they have lost their sout mate. I know I will never get over losing my husband, he cared for me for so long and now the house is so empty and unbearable.